Ok, I admit it... I just recently found out what Twitter is, but I'm learning fast. This ridiculously simple website seems to be revolutionizing skiing coverage. To that extent, FakeFasterSkier is the bomb (FakeFasterSkier). This feed has stolen a ridiculous amount of my time over the past few days and I'd suggest checking it out... better yet, just subscribe. Slowerskier is also good, but deals more with legit coverage.
Some FakeFasterSkier instant classics:
- Excerpts from the 1973 AD diary of the patron (and spiritual guide) of the #birkie - Saint Masterblastus (PM - I always appreciate a good burn like this...)
a) "He who raceth the first kilometeric length in the most aggressive fashion shall be the victor." (Vermilion loppet, anyone?)
b) "If though stompith thy neighbors pole into bits and pieces, eternal glory is assured." (This is true. There was a lot of this at the Birkie. Team FT fell victim to some of it.)
c) "Should your waxations prove ineffective, 'tis always best to blameth their failings first, for surely it is their fault."
- For you classic skiers, Toko kick wax has been fast exactly never (This is also true.)
- If Steve McQueen were reincarnated as a ski expert, his name would be Zach Caldwell. Yeah, that much of a badass. (Confirmed)
- Finally. A legit use for Peltonens - http://tinyurl.com/bjde6d
- Every time Therese Johaug skis by, I Andy Samberg myself - http://tinyurl.com/5cymxf (Phenomenal)
- Watching the non-US nations flail around on the Callaghan trails. Zach Caldwell is basically Ski Jesus. Man, you guys are screwed next year. (Confirmed. Canada, we dropped the ball.)
I could go on and on. I'm sorry to bring this Twitter feed to your attention. You're about to have one of your all time least productive days at work.